It’s no secret that those who get along well with others tend to be satisfied and happy in just about anything they do. We all know them, and some of us are them: those warm individuals that everyone seems drawn to, and who we ourselves often admire and respect. Their bright personalities attract an abundance of friends, they have loving and healthy relationships, and they are passionate and successful in their careers.
While many become successful because of their skills and abilities, it’s also ‘who you know’ that helps us get places in life. By being warm and compassionate to others, likable people create an accepting and friendly atmosphere that allows others to unwind and relax around them, leading to friendship. While it’s never healthy to worry too much about what others think of you, there are a lot of wonderful benefits that come from learning the teachable skills that likable people share.
Here Are 15 Interesting Qualities People Who Everyone Likes Have In Common
1. They Listen Attentively
Everyone feels great when they are ‘heard,’ and well-liked people are often great listeners. You really feel wonderful after spending time with them because they really listen to what you have to say. They’ll discuss what you talked about, empathizing with your feelings and allowing you to feel heard.
“People want to feel heard, to feel seen, and to feel understood, and a great listener can do this for others,” says professional counselor Heidi McBain. “Being a good listener helps you feel more connected to others, and they feel more connected to you in return.” So the next time someone is talking to you, devote that extra little bit of attention and care towards what they are saying, and show them that you really understand.
2. They Remember What You Say
People who are well liked show interest in people by remembering specific details about them. According to psychotherapist Kelly Bos, “The likable are ‘other’ focused and have a genuine interest in people, so they pay attention and make eye contact — creating an environment where people feel seen and heard,” She goes on to say: “When they are with family and friends they remember details … They also ask people meaningful questions because they want to get to know them better. When they ask ‘how are you?’ they want to know the real answer.”
3. They Have A Good Sense of Humor
Most everyone enjoys spending time with someone who has a good sense of humor. “Almost everyone loves a person who is funny,” certified counselor Jonathan Bennett notes. “This isn’t someone who can tell jokes, but a genuinely humorous person who can lighten the mood when needed and make others feel good. But, being open to humor is also an important trait for being liked,” says Bennett.
4. They Project Confidence
Likable people tend to be confident. Believing in one’s own ability to succeed and to be able to accomplish the things they set out to do causes others to like and often to agree with them. The simple affirmation; “I can do it,” when repeated often to one’s self, can boost one’s feelings of confidence over time.
5. They Are Not Afraid to Ask For Help
This one might surprise you, but if you think about it, if you had a friend who never, ever asked you for any support or help, would you really be able to call them a close friend? “Allowing someone to give to you, is a gift,” dating and relationship coach Bobbi Palmer explains. “It shows that you trust and value them in your life.”
So don’t be afraid to reach out every now and then for some support and assistance. People are often gracious and appreciate your humility and willingness to not go it alone, and they also want to be there for their friends.
6. They Empathize With Others
When we empathize with others, we are able to express love and care towards another’s situation and feelings. When people feel genuinely loved and cared for, it’s natural to like that person who is showing them love. Temi Olly, a certified relationship coach and speaker, has stated that “likable folks tend to innately understand how others are feeling, and always offer their help and support in a sincere way”.
7. They Have Open Body Language
If you come across as a warm, open, trusting person, you are more likely to have others open up to you. According to licensed psychologist Ashley B. Hampton, PhD: “Someone that extends their hand in greeting would be more likable than someone that crosses their arms when meeting us, for example. Someone that is standing or sitting facing us while we talk gives us the impression the person is interested in what we are saying and is therefore perceived as more likable.”
So the next time you are with others, check out your body language. It often can speak louder than words. Are your arms open or crossed? Are you facing and focusing on the other person? These small aspects of body language are often subconsciously perceived by others.
8. They Are Reliable and Trustworthy
Everyone wants someone they can rely on, whether it’s simply meeting for coffee, or showing up prepared for a big presentation at work. Those who are consistently on time and follow through with what they say they are going to do, tend to be trusted and seen as reliable; two favorable virtues when it comes to liking someone. Trustworthy people are honest, respectful, caring and consistent.
9. They Keep Their Focus On The Bright Side Of Things
People like and are attracted to positive people, it’s that simple. Seeing the cup as half full rather than half empty makes life seem more pleasant and enjoyable, and people feel good being around those who are grateful even in times of struggle. They try to see what can go right in situations, rather than focusing on what could go wrong, and stay focused on solutions.
10. They Are Inclusive
Likable people make sure to include others in their group, rather than making them feel like an outsider. They tend to get along well with and warmly accept many different types of people. They are masterful at making everyone feel welcome and appreciated.
According to author and lifestyle expert Jaya Myra: “By being inclusive, you show that you are not going to judge someone for being different from you, and this is a highly [likable] quality.”
11. They Don’t Take Themselves Too Seriously
Likable people have a knack for being able to laugh at themselves and about life at times. Being humble and being real is appreciated by others. Studies have shown that those who know how to laugh at themselves tend to be more cheerful and less serious than those who remain solemn. Further studies have shown that there is a positive association between the ability to laugh at oneself and one’s leadership potential.
By keeping the mood light, people are more likely to support and to be on your team.
12. They Establish Healthy Boundaries
Having healthy boundaries with what one is okay with and what one is not okay with sets a healthy foundation for friendships. Knowing one’s own limits, and communicating them in a peaceful and healthy way avoids potential future problems between two people. People also tend to respect those who have established healthy boundaries, and respected people are also liked as well.
13. They Are Curious
Likable people are always learning and growing. “Likable people are generally curious people,” Paul Christoffersen, of Christoffersen Coaching explains. “That curiosity keeps them open to other points of view and perspectives. That curiosity helps them to ask others interesting and meaningful questions. And let’s face it, we all love to talk about our favorite subject: ourself.” When we’re around people like this, we leave feeling a little bit better about ourselves and also tend to have learned something new.
14. They Treat Others With Respect
Seeing someone who treats everyone with the same amount of respect is an admirable thing to witness. No matter if it’s someone’s boss, a janitor, the person serving you lunch, or a homeless person living on the street, everyone deserves respect. Those who see the value of all human beings regardless of career, skin color, country of birth or financial status are more liked by everyone.
15. They Are Kind
People who are kind go out of their way to show love to others, and help to make the world a more beautiful place. Kindness opens the hearts of everyone involved, and this heart connection strongly causes people to like kind people. Even colleges and businesses have recently been rewriting their application processes to accept and promote individuals who advocate for and practice kindness. It’s natural to like kind people, and you’ve likely noticed the likable people in your life also are often very kind to others.
All 15 of these traits of likable people are learnable skills, so feel free to use any that you like as your own!
What are some of the most important qualities that cause you to like someone?
Let us know in the comments.
Regardless of how many you currently possess, we love you… You are Loved.